Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Celebrating the year of priests

Priests must reach out to the people

In recent years the church has become obsessed with launching all sorts of campaigns and fanciful slogans during mass. This may be aimed at creating awareness of what is happening around us, but why must it be done during mass? Will these campaigns and slogans per se bring us closer to God?

The latest was the year of the priests that was officially launched in the Penang Diocese on 17 July 2009 by the bishop Antony Selvanayagam in front of a huge crowd of pilgrims gathered there for the annual feast of St.Anne in Bukit Mertajam. Subsequently it was launched again at the parish level during mass on 9 August 2009.

The church has rightly given great importance to the priests as the pillars of our faith. This comes particularly at a time when vocations to the priesthood are dwindling. It is deeply disturbing that many seminaries are being closed due to the drastic decline in vocations. Will consecrating a whole year to priests overcome this tragic predicament of the church in Malaysia and the world today?

I for one am skeptical of launching all sorts of campaigns and fanciful slogans which unfortunately is becoming a fashion in our churches today. However launching of the year of priests created awareness of the existence of a great man is the patron saint of priests. He was Fr.Jean-Marie Vianney, a dedicated parish priest who served in the rural areas of France in the nineteenth century. Many of us knew very little about this great saint until the launching of the year of priests.

Because of his academic inadequacies Jean-Marie Vianney, upon his ordination in 1815, was sent to a remote village where the people lived in religious ignorance in the aftermath of the French Revolution. They spent much of their time in the fields working or dancing and drinking in taverns and rarely attend church. Fr.John Vianney was entrusted with the arduous task of converting these people back to the church that had to be rebuilt as they were all ruined during the revolution.

Accustomed to the most severe austerities, Fr.John Vianney lived a life of simplicity filled with works of charity and love. He was loved by the people for his imperturbable patience, common sense, remarkable insight, and supernatural knowledge. His sermons were simple in language, full of imagery drawn from daily life and country scenes and drew huge crowds from within and outside his country. He soon came to be recognized as a priest of the masses who put the welfare of his people above his.

He was particularly known for his mortifying confessions and thousands from all over the world came to meet him in the confessional where even the staunchest of sinners were converted at his mere word. During the last ten years of his life, he spent sixteen to eighteen hours a day in the confessional. His bishop had to forbid him from attending the annual retreats of the diocesan clergy because of the laege number of poor ‘souls’ awaiting him. Fr.John Vianney gave priority to the people in need over meetings, retreats and his own conveniences, which are rarely seen these days, not only among priests but among us in all professions.

St.Jean-Marie Vianney was appropriately chosen as the patron saint of parish priests in 1929. Although the situation in today’s world may be far more complex from what used to at his time but the living image of him should remain as an inspiration for our own priests today. Things may have changed drastically but the essence of Christ’s teachings still remains relevant and will continue to do so for generations to come.

Let this year of the priests be a reminder to our priests that they should emulate the example of their patron saint in reaching out to the people under their care. They too, like St.John Vanney, should strive to become the priests of the masses by being the symbol of love, charity and humility.

As we pray for our priests at mass every week during this special year dedicated to the priests, let us ask God to endow us with priests who would reflect the image of their patron saint in their lives and services to their parishioners. Let us pray our priests, like St John Vainney, will be more approachable even to the most despised in the parish. Let us ask God to inspire and strengthen our priests to forgive and convert even the most ardent sinner by their examples and their power of penitence.

Dr.Chris Anthony

Tuesday, August 04, 2009

Bring Christ not politics into church ministries

Give opportunity for all to serve

Bernie de Rozario in her letter “Pray for our priests daily as they remain focused on God” (Herald July 19) expressed her frustrations of what is going in her parish. She seems to very disturbed that some parishioners ‘monopolize’ the priests so much so that others have no access to him. In fact the problems she highlighted are not unique to her parish but one that is common in many others as well.

In most organizations the leader is often surrounded by group of loyalists who will do anything for the leader. They would take great pains to please the leader often for their own benefits. They have a lot of influence on the leader and the way he behaves and deals with others under his care. Over time the leader if not careful becomes blinded by these loyalists and that is where the whole trouble starts.

The situation in most of our parishes is no different where the priest is ‘monopolized’ by a few to the extent an inexperienced priest succumbs to their influence. Both the priest and the laity are equally responsible for the problems that exist in most parishes that finally lead to a tremendous strain in the clergy-laity relationship.

Many of our younger priests lack conviction in their vocation and therefore are not focused in serving God through His people and get distracted along the way. In a recent homily, the bishop of Penang, Rt Rev Anthony Selvanayagam, lamented at the poor caliber of those entering the seminary these days. How can we expect the seminary to churn out good, committed and holy priests when in the first place they lack the basic human values to start with, he asked?

Often the young priests lack the maturity and wisdom that comes only with experience, to handle the various complex problems posed by the people who seek their guidance. As a result they are easily carried away by the mesmerizing words and actions of those who get into their inner circle and their judgments become biased, at times even unfair. Handling humans is formidable task that need many years of painstaking experience to accomplish successfully. Every person is unique and the more people we have the greater and more complicated the task becomes.

A lesson that I have learnt through my experiences in life is "Not all who rush to the fore are good and not all who stay away are bad either". To be a good leader one must acquire the wisdom to see through the sweet words and actions of those who surround him and the so- called rebellious behavior of those who stay away.

The lay people are also largely to blame for the many problems that plague our parishes today. The uncompromising and selfish attitude of some in wanting to seek power and glory for themselves and their family puts even the most experienced the priest in a very difficult situation. They think they love God by becoming front-line worshipers but do little to show they love their neighbor as they are always at loggerheads with them. They are not very different from our national politicians of whom we all are very critical.

The vast majority of the laity do not want to get involved in the politics of the church and as the silent majority they prefer go on with their daily chores in peace accepting, often grudgingly, whatever decisions made by those in power. It is unfortunate the invaluable talents among this huge group of parishioners remain largely untapped due to the unhealthy politicking that goes on at the top around the parish priest.

To overcome these problems it would be wise for the leadership of the various organizations to be elected and their terms in office limited, so that more parishioners are given the chance to contribute their knowledge, talents and skills for the overall physical and spiritual development of the parish. The priest must reach out to majority who stay away and not allow him to be influenced by the few surrounding him.

There is a large pool of gifted and talented people in all fields within our community, why just allow a handful to monopolize and dominate the running of the parish and the parish priest, causing a great deal of unhappiness among the majority?

Dr.Chris Anthony

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Racism in the church

Let's rid ourselves of the inherent racist trait from our hearts

One of the greatest problems that plagued mankind throughout the ages and continue to do so till today is racism. The Cambridge dictionary defines racism as the belief that people's qualities are influenced by their race and that the members of other races are not as good as the members of your own, or the resulting unfair treatment of members of other races.

A racist is therefore someone who believes that other races are not as good as their own and therefore treats them unfairly. Basically all of us are racists to some extent as this feeling of superiority exists in the hearts all of us. As Christians we must strive to rid ourselves of the inherent racist trait from our hearts to regard all men as equal.

The Catholic Church has been a staunch critic of racism wherever and whenever it occurs, particularly in the administration of the country. Unfortunately the very evil that it condemned has now become one of the major problems confronting the church itself. This could be attributed to the education system that tends to segregate the races from a very young age which had created a generation of Malaysians who are highly conscious of their ethnic origin.

They prefer to regard themselves more as Malays, Chinese and Indians than Malaysians, interacting with those of their own race. They may appear to be living happily together side by side but the differences among them are dividing them more than the commonness that unites them. When we do not understand the cultures and traditions of our ‘friends’ from other races how can we be expected to respect each others differences?

This racially orientated culture has inevitably permeated into our church where it further aggravated the problem by creating the various language groups. In the fifties and sixties when English was the main means of communication there was greater unity among the various races in the church, namely Chinese, Indians and Eurasians. Today there is so much conflict of interest among the various communities that is threatening to split the church into the various language groups.

In fact today in most parishes the three language groups have become so polarized with each working in isolation. Their occasional encounters end up in misunderstanding and even quarrels. Multi-language masses to cater for all three groups have become a trend these days. This so called ‘rojak mass’ does not have any tangible benefits for any particular group. Instead it only unduly prolongs the service but benefits no one.

Whenever a new parish priest takes over there is so much lobbying by the Tamil and Mandarin speaking parishioners to have a priest from their own race. The situation is so serious that when an Indian priest comes the Chinese speaking members “migrate” out to other parishes leaving a largely Indian community in the parish. It is the same with Tamil speaking parishioners when a Chinese priest takes over. This unhealthy trend is becoming more entrenched and is creating so much hate and suspicion of each other instead of love and brotherhood that Christ promoted.

To make matters worse the new generation of priests themselves becomes racially inclined, being closely associated with members of their community. This creates suspicion and ill-feeling among the other community and all sorts of allegations and rumors surface, many of which may be unfounded and mischievous.

From the past we know that a common language will go a long way to integrate the various communities and it has to be either Bahasa Malaysia or English, the latter is preferable for obvious reasons. We have to realize that despite our differences we are all children of God and therefore share a common brotherhood in our Lord Jesus. Ill-feelings, hatred and suspicion for those of a different race are contrary to the very teachings of Christ who advocated love for all including our enemies.

The priests and church leaders too should conduct themselves in a manner that they are seen to be neutral and caring for all regardless of ethnicity. As parents we must show our kids an exemplary behavior that illustrates the right attitude towards our parishioners of different race. In short, what ethnic culture we belong to is not important, what is important is for us to adopt a Christian culture that is color blind which does not distinguish one by his ethnicity but by his comradeship as fellow humans. That is what Christ wants and that is exactly what we must do.

It is unfortunate that we have today a new generation of Malaysians, both priests, parents and the laity in general, who are so racially charged so much so they become very sensitive and intolerant to the comments and criticisms from members of other races. Under these circumstances forging racial goodwill and integration is a difficult task but if we do not start in our church how can we expect our politicians to do so at the national levels where it is far more complex and challenging?

Dr.Chris Anthony

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Bring Christ not politics into church ministries

Give opportunity for all to serve

Bernie de Rozario in her letter “Pray for our priests daily as they remain focused on God” (Herald July 19) expressed her frustrations of what is going in her parish. She seems to very disturbed that some parishioners ‘monopolize’ the priests so much so that others have no access to him. In fact the problems she highlighted are not unique to her parish but one that exists in many others as well.

In most organizations the leader is often surrounded by group of loyalists who will do anything for the leader. They would take great pains to please the leader often for their own benefits. They have a lot of influence on the leader and the way he behaves and deals with others under his care. Over time the leader if not careful becomes blinded by these loyalists and that is where the whole trouble starts.

The situation in most of our parishes is no different where the priest is ‘monopolized’ by a few to the extent an inexperienced priest succumbs to their influence. Both the priest and the laity are equally responsible for the problems that exist in most parishes that finally lead to a tremendous strain in the clergy-laity relationship.

Many of our younger priests lack conviction in their vocation and therefore are not focused in serving God through His people and therefore get distracted along the way. In a recent homily, the bishop of Penang, Rt Rev Anthony Selvanayagam, expressed lamented at the poor caliber of those entering the seminary these days. According to him they have a tough time making into them normal humans let alone turning into holy men of God. This is a shocking revelation and a very serious problem that could affect the future of our religion in the world that is becoming increasingly more materialistic.

Parents today fail in their obligation to instill basic human values in their children, abdicating that role to the church and schools which are also unable to fulfill that important duty. How can we expect the seminary to churn out good, committed and holy priests when in the first place they lack the basic human values to start with?

Often the young priests lack the maturity and wisdom that comes only with experience, to handle the various problems posed by the people .As a result they are easily swayed by those who get into their inner circle whereby their judgments become biased at times even unfair. Handling human beings is formidable task that need many years of painstaking experience to accomplish successfully. Every person is unique and the more people we have the greater and more complicated the task becomes.

The lay people are also largely to blame for the many problems that plague our parishes today. The uncompromising and selfish attitude of some in wanting to seek power and glory for themselves and their family puts the priest in a very difficult situation. They fail to realize these are the very evils that were detested by Christ himself. They do not show any love, forgiveness and humility in their dealings with others. They say they love God by becoming front-line worshippers but do little to show they love their neighbor as they are always at loggerheads with them. They are not very different from our national politicians of whom we all are very critical.

The vast majority of the laity do not want to get involved in the politics of the church and as the silent majority they prefer go on with their daily chores in peace accepting, often grudgingly, whatever decisions made by those in power. It is unfortunate the invaluable talents among this huge group of parishioners remain largely untapped due to the unhealthy politicking that goes on at the top around the parish priest.

The leadership of the various organizations must be elected and their terms in office limited to two, so that more parishioners are given the chance to contribute their knowledge, talents and skills for the overall physical and spiritual development of the parish. There is a large pool of gifted people in our community, why just allow a handful to monopolize and dominate the running of the parish and the parish priest, causing a great deal of unhappiness among the majority?

Dr.Chris Anthony

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Furore over spying in church

Need to respect practices of other religions

The report in Al Islam magazine claiming its reporters had entered a church that was alleged to be converting Muslims into Christianity is very disturbing. They were also reported to have been spying to see whether the word “Allah” was being used in the church service. Furthermore these non-Christian reporters in disguise were also alleged to have participated in the religious rituals and practices that are strictly restricted to Catholic Christians only.

They were also reported to have ridiculed the rituals and insulted the ‘Eucharist’ that are held in great reverence by the Catholics. The actions of these reporters were very irresponsible and dangerous especially in a nation with diverse races and faiths. It sets an unhealthy precedence that could cause disharmony, ill feelings and hatred among the people of different religions.

The irresponsible actions of these reporters are considered sacrileges and have deeply hurt and angered the congregation in particular and the Catholic community in general. Some concerned members of the Catholic community have rightly made police reports to investigate the matter and take appropriate action without fear or favor. Will the police rise up to be more professional in handling this rather sensitive issue, which if not checked immediately will have drastic repercussions?

The freedom to practice one’s faith is guaranteed in the Federal Constitution and it must be respected by all parties. Religion and its rituals and practices, however peculiar they may appear to non-believers, is a very private and sensitive matter that must be treated utmost with respect and reverence. Similarly all places of worship must be accorded the sanctity they deserve as belittling them and the practices there-in would be amounting to acts of sacrilege that would incite anger which will have dangerous repercussions in a multi-ethnic country like ours.

Unauthorized entry into places of worship for the purpose of spying and belittling religious practices of others is a serious offense that must never be tolerated. The police must act quickly and decisively to stop such irresponsible people, regardless of the religion they belong, from creating chaos in the country. Bringing them to face the full wrath of the law will discourage others from resorting to such provocative actions. Failing to act will lead to the disruption of the fragile inter-religious harmony that we have in the country.

At the same time in a multiracial and multi-religious country it would be wrong and dangerous to try to convert someone from faith to another. It would only create suspicion, anger and hate that lead to violence that could tear the country apart like in some countries. I do not think there will be any Christian with a right mind would want to convert Muslims to Christianity. The majority of us want to live peacefully with our brethren of other faiths, with mutual respect for the religious practices and cultures of one another.

On the contrary, as all religions preach love, goodwill and forgiveness towards fellow men irrespective of their believe, it would be better to encourage people to be true to their own religious teachings and thereby become better humans in their own faiths.

After all, aren’t all religions the same as they all lead their followers to the one same God despite their bitter disputes, quarrels and times war that they wage against one another along the way, ironically in His name?

As Catholics we may be tempted to react with anger and hate against those who have desecrated our faith, but we must not act emotionally but it a time to demonstrate that despite their ridicule and hate we will strict to what Jesus himself taught and did - to love his enemies. His message to us “Lord, forgive them for they do not know what they are doing” should remind us of the virtue of forgiveness even for our enemies.

It is timely for the bishops with the consultation of the various religious leaders of the MCCBCHST to issue an official statement strongly condemning the sacrilegious actions of the reporters concerned. This would persuade the national leaders to take the necessary actions to stop the religious fanaticism from taking deeper roots in our country.

Dr.Chris Anthony

Monday, June 22, 2009

One-day compulsory rest for domestic maids

Will not solve their abuse

The recent spate of domestic maid abuse cases that led to the threat by the Indonesian government to temporarily halt sending their domestic helpers to Malaysia is a blow for our reputation as being friendly, kind and hospitable particularly to foreigners.

To demonstrate its grave concern for the welfare of these foreign workers, the government had introduced a number of new regulations for potential employers, the latest being the compulsory weekly one-day rest for all maids. Its motive for introducing the compulsory day off may be good and commendable but it is not the main contention in the issue of maid abuse as most would agree that adequate rest must be given to the maids. However indiscriminate enforcement of this rule may create unnecessary inconvenience and disadvantages to the majority of employers who are considerate and caring for their maids.

Maid abuse by employers is a serious offence that must not be condoned whatsoever but it must be remembered that the vast majority of Malaysian employers treat their maids reasonably well and take good care of their welfare. We know that there are many employers who treat them like members of their own families, being caring, kind, considerate and humane. These employers must be given some leeway to manage their maids in the way they see it as best for them. By implementing a blanket one-day rest rule for all maids the good employers may be unfairly punished whereas the errant ones may find their way out to escape the effects of the law.

It is very sad that many of our maids are lured into the country with false promises. Many are made to believe that they will be employed as factory workers and not as domestic maids. They react with anger and resentment when they realize the truth on landing on our shores. They just wait to escape at the slightest opportunity they get. Who will take the financial and legal responsibility if these maids run away?

It must also be remembered that the vast majority of our domestic maids come from very poor socio-economic background with low literacy rate. Many of them are ignorant on managing their meager income and I am afraid that by allowing them day off will result in overspending leaving with no savings when they leave the country on completion of their contract. Many employers go out of the way to act as financial advisors to help their maids to save as much as they can while they are with them.

Giving them a day off and allowing them full freedom to go will only be subjecting them to unnecessary risks like robbery, assault, rape and cheating. Some of them could easily be lured into immoral activities that expose them to all forms of diseases, drug abuse and crime which the employer can least afford to be involved. As an employer is directly responsible for the safety of his maid, it would be grave injustice if a good employer is dragged into such problems of his maid which is no fault of his. Wouldn’t it be better if the employer is allowed some freedom and discretion to provide what is best for her?

Education not compulsion is the key to overcome the problem of maid abuse. The maid and the employer must be educated on their rightful roles and duties. They must be educated to realize that they should be engaged for mutual benefit and the terms of their employment agreement must be adhered to strictly at all times. A rest day may be given if the maid chooses to have it but she must remain in the vicinity of the watchful eyes of the employer. However if she opts for monetary compensation then it should be granted if the employer needs her services on the rest day.

Human Resources Ministry must conduct an in depth study into the issue of compulsory one-day off rule before implementing it indiscriminately. It should get the feedback from the employers, maid agencies and other relevant bodies before coming to any conclusive decisions. Although there are advantages and disadvantages of enforcing such a rule, there seems to be more negative repercussions than positive ones.
There are good and bad employers so are domestic maids. What is important is to ensure that the majority who are good should not be punished because of a few bad hats. The latter be it employers or maids must be sought out and punished in accordance with the laws.

Over sixty years ago Mahatma Gandhi said “The greatness of a nation and its moral progress can be judged by the way its animals are treated”. Today it may be more apt to say that the greatness of a nation and its moral progress can be judged by the way its citizens treat their fellow humans regardless of race, creed and social status.

Dr.Chris Anthony

Monday, June 15, 2009

Father's day 2009 : A tribute to Uncle Paul

The final journey

As I reached the crowded hospital ward, I saw Uncle Paul lying on his bed semi-comatose, gasping and on nasal oxygen. He looked so thin and emaciated that I could hardly recognize him. I held his hand firmly and called him but there was no response whatsoever from him. Then all of a sudden he took a deep breath which was his last. Uncle Paul died peacefully in front of me. It was as though he had patiently waited for me since his admission for a serious lung infection 3 days earlier. I cursed myself for not going to see him earlier.

Uncle Paul was an elderly gentleman whom I had the privilege of being befriends over the last 2 years or so, having met him on a number of occasions recently. Uncle Paul had journeyed through life for the past 87years until his demise on 15 May 2009.His vast experiences in his life added further to the many lessons I have learnt in my own. I hope a brief description of this wonderful person will enrich your own experiences in dealing with those around you.

I always believe that every human is a marvelous creation of God, who is a chest of knowledge and experience waiting to be tapped. Uncle Paul is undeniably such a marvelous creation of His.

In a world that is so materialistic, so competitive and so advanced in technology, when we are so busy toiling to make ends meet we have very little time for old people like Paul who have nothing valuable to contribute to our advancements. We fail to realize that every human, regardless of race and religion, young or old, rich or poor is a chest of treasure and knowledge for us in life to be tapped for our own benefit and the benefit of those around us.

In fact many of us today do not have the time even for our own aged parents, who have made us what we are now. We find so many excuses to send them away somewhere hoping they would be happier there than being with us. We pass the responsibility to others who may even be strangers, hoping that they can provide better care and comfort than us in our own homes. One such place is the old folk’s homes that are mushrooming all over the country due to the tremendous increase in demand. We may have no choice so do they as all old people will never opt for such a place if only they had a choice to be taken care in their own homes.

Uncle Paul stayed in one such home and he appeared happy to be in the company of fellow inmates. Fortunately he still received his monthly pension to pay for his maintenance at the home. His basic needs were taken care of reasonably well and he was regularly visited by his children, relatives and friends. Some visit him out of duty others out of courtesy but it was encouraging that there were a number of them who did so out of love for him as a fellow human, bringing him food and gifts he liked and missed most. Like all parents, he never blamed his children for sending him there, but we knew that deep inside he missed their continuous company. He missed his home, not just the building but the company of his loved ones.

He lost his wife 20 years ago when she died after a short illness and till his last days he missed her so dearly. At the twilight of life, as his physical and mental faculties began to fail him to fail him one by one; he had no permanent companion to cling on for support, solace and reassurance. That was the time he wished so badly that his wife was around to share the pains of old age. His eyes used to swell with tears each time he talked about the darling in his life. He used to repeatedly say, “if only my wife was around, I will not be here.”

I learnt a lot about the past from my meetings with him, about life at the time of the British and the Japanese occupation, his family and all his experiences over the past 86 years. As I myself grow older, and my children leaving home one by one, I seem to appreciate his experiences much more as they are becoming increasingly more relevant in my own life. I look around and see that many more leading such solitude lives without a shoulder to lean on for solace. Are we heading for such lonely lives in the years to come? Only time will tell but is frightening to think we may be so.

Punctuality

Among some of the things that struck me first on meeting Uncle Paul was his neatly groomed appearance and his punctuality. Every time I make an appointment to meet him he is ready waiting for me, neatly dressed in slacks, long sleeved shirt and polished shoes. According to his caretaker he used to wake up and get ready hours earlier and sit in the porch eagerly waiting for my arrival. He never failed to greet me as soon as he sees me. I could sense the warmth in his voice and the grip of his handshake.Depite his failing memory he would remember the details of children and never once failed to enquire about them each time we met.

His punctuality puts many of us to shame as we have very little regards for time and people these days. Punctuality is an indication of our eagerness to meet someone and it reflects the place we accord him in our hearts. I understand if we value somebody’s company then we would never be late to meet him as our minds will always be preoccupied with thoughts of that person. These days very few people value the true company of others unless they have something to gain and that may be the reasons why we are always late for appointments. We tend to value a person by his material possession not by the contents of his heart. We seem to have lost the human touch in our dealings with fellow men.

Living steadfast to his father’s advice

Another interesting thing I learnt from Uncle Paul was his attitude towards his late parents that was reflected in his advice to the youngsters of today. He remembered and cherished what his father had advised him when he was working in the government service as a young man.

He recalled his father’s strong stand against corruption. He remembered what his late father had told him, “If you are in dire need of money, you may borrow or even beg for it but never accept bribes however desperate you may be”.

He adhered to his father’s advised so strictly that he could not afford to own his own house and lived in government quarters all his life. At the twilight years of his life he did not have a place to call home and had to settle for an old folk’s home as his abode. It was the price he had to pay for being steadfast in submitting to his father’s stand against corruption.
Advice to the young

When asked for his advice to the youngsters of today, who have little respect for the elderly, he said, “They should honor their father and mother and everything else will be fine”. Reflecting on what he said and recalling the experiences with many, I realized how right he was. He may be old and senile but he pushed forward a point about a very important issue in our lives, honoring our parents, which I agree determines to a great extent whether we attain the happiness we all strive for. If we miss this important lesson then all our efforts to seek that happiness will all be in vain.

To honor our parents is not just providing food and shelter, but to show great respect for them especially for their pride, honesty and the principles for which they stood steadfast. Do the actions in our own lives reflect this honor that is due to them? We must always do things that uphold their pride and honor; otherwise we would be failing them.

We make many major decisions in our lives, like choosing our life partners; change of career, travelling to distant land, caring for our children, major illnesses and so on. Do we consult them, at least as a mark of respect, regarding these major changes in our lives? They may not be in a position to give us the physical or monetary help but I am sure they can give us something that all the money in the world cannot buy - advice based on personal experience. Unfortunately this invaluable commodity is the least we value these days.

Giving what they like

Often we give our elderly parents what we think they like, not realizing their true likes and dislikes. As children we believe that we are giving them the best by sending them to the old folk’s home where they have the company and are well catered for their needs. It is pertinent to ask ourselves whether they are really happy to be there. Do they need the company of others who are strangers and physically infirm? Is this what they need most at that advanced age?

They may say that they are happy there because they do not want to burden us further which is the typical sense of magnanimity of all elderly parents towards their children; however negligent or even cruel the children may be to them the parents will always have a soft spot for them in their hearts.

Loneliness, the greatest fear

Uncle Paul’s greatest fear, like all elderly people, was loneliness. This was particularly profound after the demise of his wife 20 years ago. He had the feeling that he was all alone in this cruel world. It was pathetic to realize that at the age of 86, staying in a home for the aged and surrounded by unfamiliar faces, he had very little to hope for during the final months of his life except waiting to be united with his wife which the Lord finally did.

Uncle Paul may not be around anymore but his memories and the lessons from his experiences live on in the hearts of those who know him. He and many others like him give us the opportunity to provide them a little hope and cheer in their lives, if not every day, but least during special days like Father’s Day, birthdays, anniversaries and so on. It is not money, gifts or food that they need most. All they yearn for is the love of fellow humans like you and I, in particular his children and grandchildren, to unselfishly share a little bit of our time to be with them during these special days in their lives.

As Christians we spend many hours in prayer and worship but ignore those around us not realizing that God actually dwells in these people. People like Paul should remind us that Jesus indeed lives in them not in the majestic churches we visitto pray in and the rituals we perform in our worship.We must recall what Jesus himself taught us "In as much as you have done it to one of the least of these my brothers, you have done it to me.”(Mathew 25:34-40)

Dr.Chris Anthony

Sunday, June 14, 2009

Pope: The absence of Christ causes total sadness

Yes the absence of Chris causes total sadness in the world especially in our own lives.His absence in our hearts is the cause of all our miseries.

Christ seems to be absent even in the church which professes to bring Him into the lives of men.The church is more obsessed with rituals and form than the real substance of Christ's teachings.

Christs asks us to find Him in those around us,especially our enemies,but we foolishly keep searching for Him all over except where He really dwells - in our neighbor.